Now that I’ve worked here for awhile I can confidently say that we consistently have people come in here curious about anal and looking to try it for the first time, but don’t know where to start. To all of those people, you and I are in this together because I also just started exploring anal. So drawing inspiration from everyone who walks in here not knowing where to start and my own desire to explore anal, here are some anal basics to get you started!
Why Do Anal?
A question I get from both those who are interested in anal and those who aren’t is why do anal? Well, there’s a lot of different answers for that and it’s going to be different for everyone. Some people are simply curious, some have heard good things, and for me I want to experiment with how to take sex to the next level. One reason people like anal is because it can intensify orgasms. Particularly when using an anal plug, clenching down around something can make orgasms more intense and pleasurable, regardless of your gender. If you have a prostate, both anal sex and an anal plug can hit your prostate, which is a major source of pleasure. Plus, wearing an anal plug while penetrating can increase pleasure as the plug repeatedly hits the prostate. For those of you with vaginas, the wall between the anus and the vagina is thin, which means the penetrating partner can feel the vibrations while penetrating the vagina. Finally, anal tissue is sensitive so stimulating it can be pleasurable and intense, something that draws many people to anal.
Types of Anal Toys
There are a couple of different anal toys and each offer their own pleasures. Perhaps the most well known anal toy is the anal plug. Anal plugs come in glass, metal or silicone, come in all different shapes and sizes, and can be vibrating or not vibrating. B-Vibe even has a vibrating anal plug that has a rimming feature in the base to stimulate the opening to the anal cavity. Anal plugs are typically intended to be inserted and left in, to offer a filling and/or vibrating feeling, often while penetrating or being penetrated. Another option is anal beads. Unlike anal plugs, the real strength of anal beads is when they are being inserted and removed. Anal beads typically look like a bunch of round beads connected together or connected by a string. The texture of anal beads allow for variations in stimulation by inserting and removing them before, during, and after sex. Finally anal sex can also use a dildo or a penis, which is likely the largest of the three options and is similar to vaginal sex where the penis or dildo is inserted and removed repeatedly. So do you research and think about what kind of anal sex you want to have so you know which toys to invest in.
Important Things To Remember
It’s very important to practice general cleanliness and lube up when doing anal. Cleanliness should be of the highest priority, whether you’re just using your fingers or using a toy. The anal canal is the same canal where feces passes through, so you do not want to open yourself up to bacteria. One of the most important cleanliness practices is never going from anal insertion to vaginal insertion. It doesn’t matter if you’re using fingers, a toy, or a penis, you do not want to insert it into the anus and then into the vagina after because there is the possibility of exposing your vagina to harmful bacteria. That being said, you can definitely go from vagina to anus and you can switch from anus to vagina IF you clean your toy thoroughly before switching. However, best practice is definitely having different anal toys and vaginal toys.
Lube is another crucial aspect of anal. Unlike the vagina, the anus does not self lubricate, meaning it’s even more important to use lube and to use it liberally. First things first, make sure you use lube that fits the anal activity you’re doing and any toys you’re using. Check out my previous post on lube as a starting point for deciding what lube to use. Make sure you choose quality lube, whether you’re getting silicone or water-based, you want to make sure its body safe and glycerin free. Also be careful to avoid warming, cooling, and flavored lubes or anything else that might have unnecessary and potentially irritating ingredients in them. Most importantly, do not get anal lube that has desensitizer to numb the anus. It may be tempting to want less sensation when first trying out anal but the ability to feel when something is painful is very important with anal, especially since anal tissue is so sensitive and more prone to tearing and STIs. Instead try an anal lube with relaxer so you can still feel when something it hurting you.
Go For It!
Now that you’ve decided you want to do anal, have decided what you want to use for penetration, and know how to keep yourself clean and lubricated, it’s time to try it out! So here are a few things to keep in mind as you explore this new dimension of your sexuality. You want to make and keep things as clean as possible, so make sure you’re going to the bathroom before and after anal penetration. You may also want to consider an enema before anal sex to ensure you are clean and ready for penetration. It’s also so important to get to know yourself! Take some time to experiment with external stimulation and fingers before trying anything larger. And on that note, start small and light with small, silicone plugs or an increasing number of fingers; then work up to bigger, heavier, and less porous materials.
Perhaps the most important ingredient of anal (if you’re doing it with a partner) is to communicate! Whether you’re giving or receiving anal, make sure you’re being attentive and vocal about how you’re feeling, what you want and how far you’re willing to go. So, be gentle and go slowly, throughout the entire process even taking toys, fingers or penis out. And finally, if it hurts, stop; it might feel weird or even uncomfortable, especially your first time, but if it hurts you need to slow down and re-adjust so you don’t hurt yourself.
So go forth, experiment, I know I will! If you’re looking for more tips or for a toy to help you out, come visit us in store so we can find something that’s just right for you!